I heard about a tragedy at work today that gave me a flashback of a tragedy 17 years ago today.

I was 11 years old. It was the morning of December 20. I woke up (I must of not had school this day) and walked out to the kitchen where I saw my mother crying on the telephone. This was usually not a good sign. I listened to the conversation for a bit and knew something was terribly wrong. I turned around, without thinking I was seen, and crawled back in bed. I waited for the bad news to come. My mother came into my bedroom with tears streaming down her face. She kneeled at my bedside and proceeded to tell me that last night, my best friends mother slipped on some ice, hit head first on the cement and was in a coma. Her brain was too swollen to do anything and they would be taking her off life support this morning. My best friends family was good friends with my family. I was heartbroken. For the first time in my life, I really felt I was experiencing a personal tragedy. The only other family accident I remember is my grandma having a major stroke and miraculously, she turned out to be just fine.

After my mother left my room, I kneeled down at the side of my bed and prayed as hard as I could for a miracle to happen and for my best friends mother to be ok. I bargained with the Lord. I pleaded and cried. Later that morning, during my piano lesson with my mom, my best friend called me from the hospital. She was sobbing. She called to tell me that she couldn't have a planned sleepover tonight because her mom just died. I was speechless. What could I possible say to my best friend to comfort her or express my sadness? I'm sure I mumbled out a few "I'm so sorry" statements and she told me she would talk to me later. I always knew Christmas would never be the same for her and her family.

Today I learned of a co-worker's father passing away yesterday in a similar accident. I would consider myself friends with this co-worker and my heart aches for him and his family and once again, I am left speechless, wanting to express sympathy but not sure of the best way. I'm sure Christmas will never be the same for him and his family.

With all of the recent tragedies across the nation, reach out to those you love and let them know how much you love and appreciate them. Forgive others. Accepts others forgiveness. Let go of grudges. This holiday season can be wonderful time of reflecting, loving and sharing. Love as Christ loved - without judgement and without hesitation. I love hearing from each of my siblings that they love me, whether it's a short "love you" at the end of phone conversation, when leaving each others company or the phrase at the end of an email, it means a lot to me.

I don't know how many people actually read my blog but for those who come across this post, I would like to wish you all a very merry holiday season - however you celebrate. May you feel God's love for you.

What am I grateful for?

Instead of annoying all my FB friends with a post every day for the month November, I thought I would show you in one blog what I am thankful for through pictures! 30 thanks for 30 days. Enjoy!

I am thankful for friends that take care of me and cheer me up when I am down

I am thankful for food to eat and the fact that, believe it or not, that I can prepare a meal.

I am thankful for wonderful women in my life who are wonderful examples

I am thankful for the memories I have of my grandparents and the wonderful

people they are

I am thankful for nieces and nephews who bring such joy into my life

I am thankful for a family that I can be myself with and that accepts me

no matter how silly I may be

I am thankful I am able to take vacations that show me the beauty of this earth

I am thankful for sushi. Yum.

I am thankful for sibilings who support me and love me

(disclaimer: I'm not only talking about the two pictured :) )

I am thankful that my state has a professional sports team I can cheer for

(I, however, am not grateful for Deron Williams)

I am thankful for loving animals who are always excited to see you

I am grateful for agency and that I have a choice over everything I do

(I made this for a class in college - it was my life mission statement)

I am grateful for an education

I am thankful for kind strangers who will lend a helping hand

I am thankful for new life and the new beginnings it symbolizes

I am thankful that my parents are happily married

I am thankful for my Savior and the ultimate sacrifice He made for me

I am thankful for the natural beauty Utah has to offer

I am thankful that I can 

a) support myself with a great job

b) I don't have to dumpster dive 

I am thankful for the opportunity to have lived in so many wonderful places

I am thankful for a patient mother who allowed me to plaster my walls with Rock posters

when I was in high school, knowing I'd grow out of that phase. Eventually.

I am grateful to have the college experience and live away from home

I am thankful for the wonderful advances in technology

(This one is kind of a stretch....)

I am thankful to know that I will always have a saftey net below me. That I will never fall far enough for my Heavenly Father to reach me.

I am thankful to live in a land of many, many freedoms

I am thankful for all of God's creatures and the chance I've had to interact with them

(even if they do scare me or give me the heebie jeebies)

(Another stretch.... bear with me)

I am thankful for a bed to sleep in at night and a roof over my head

(I'm on the top bunk)

I am grateful for a (seemingly) fair justice system.

I am thankful to know that dreams do come true

Halloweenie!

I love this time of year! Fall is my favorite season. Cute boots, sweaters, hot cocoa, crunchy colorful leaves and of course.... Halloween! Halloween and Christmas are tied for my favorite holiday. I love going to corn mazes, carving pumpkins, haunted houses and my favorite - candy corn. I'd thought I would share pictures of Halloween past. Enjoy!

My pumpkin is on the left. I think this was the first year I didn't injure myself.

My sister made this decoration (there were a few) for a family party last year. Pintrest!

Checking out Gardner Village - such cute Halloween decorations/props

My cute nieces and nephews out in Cali for Halloween last year. Look at that nut Hannah - hilarious!

I only wore the fake teeth for this picture. Two seconds later they were in the garbage.

Showin' some love to the armed forces.

Nerd and a fairy. Great roommate combo :)

So sometimes in Halloween stores, I put the props on and walk around...

Perfect pumpkin

Rachel wore heels to the pumpkin patch. Dirt + heels = not a good idea.

This was the year my friends wanted to do a super hero theme. By the time I found out about the theme, all the female super heroes were taken. So even though I despise Harry Potter.... he has super powers, right?

Threw this costume together in three seconds. Jazz jersey. Boozer, no less. SCARY!

Candlelit face - always a fright

EEE! EEE! EEE! That's supposed to be the sound of a wielding knife.

Haunted Forest!

The Howl 2003. 80's rocker chicks.

For those who live in Provo/Orem during 2006 - 2007, you know the parties at the Hollywood House. There is no room to move!

With Featherbone and Leah. And some random cowboy dude.

The pumpkins are about as big as she is

My werewolf cupcake I made at a RS activity. Awesome!

I can't believe my sister and bro in law trusted Michael with a poker...

Presh!